Lasting Impressions

So I got tagged in one of those viral Facebook posts. This one asked me to list 12 (why not 10?)albums from different artists that made a lasting impression on me. An odd request, not 'best albums' but ones that have stayed with me. As a result, more recent albums I've bought don't really count, so this is gonna be hard.
Anyway, I thought that this would actually be too difficult for a throwaway Facebook status, so here's a blog post instead.
I won't be tagging anyone else to do it, but Ed, Chris & Jedd can if they want to.
So, in alphabetical order (because that's how I'm looking through things on iTunes)...

#1

Rocks - Aerosmith

This was the first Aerosmith album I ever bought, and every time I listen to it takes me back to when I first got it. It introduced me to 70s rock for the first time, so this album can probably be blamed for my entire style.

It's also just a really good album. I bought it initially because it had Rats in the Cellar on it (my favourite, then, song to play on Guitar Hero: Aerosmith), and because it's usually considered to be their best. This is Aerosmith at the height of their drug powers, before those powers started to take over. Nobody's Fault is probably the highlight.

#2

Welcome 2 My Nightmare - Alice Cooper

There may well be a lot of 'firsts' on this list. This was the first Alice Cooper Album I bought. Not sure why, it was his then (and still is) latest album, but it was a sequel to a previous album which I didn't own.

Either way, this was my first real introduction in to a concept album which I actually 'got'. I'd listened to Thick as a Brick and Sgt Pepper's before, but this was the first album where I felt the concept was so clever and well worked in to the music.

If only every Alice Cooper album was as good as this one...

#3

Rubber Soul - The Beatles

I could have picked almost any Beatles album really. But this is probably the one I return to most. Something about them being on the very cusp of going psychedelic makes this such an interesting album.

Songs like Drive My Car and Nowhere Man may well be novelty songs, but that doesn't matter. It's a funny, dark and weird album in places, and that's what makes it great.

#4

Blue Öyster Cult - Blue Öyster Cult

BÖC's first album opens with what is probably still my favourite song of theirs (tied with Career of Evil); Transmaniacon MC.

Why did this album leave such an impression? Well mostly because the names of the songs are so strange; I'm On The Lamb But I Ain't No Sheep, Before The Kiss A Redcap, She's As Beautiful As A Foot. It goes on.

But also because most of the album is brilliant. Unfortunately it's mired by a few duff songs (The Foot song being one), but it's still the most memorable BÖC album to me.

#5

Flight of the Conchords - Flight of the Conchords

Yep, definitely not a list of 'best' albums. I mean, I skipped over Bob Dylan and The Doobie Brothers to get here.

This album was my favourite album for a very long time, when I was like 15. For that, it's got to be here.

But it is also very good, FotC are probably one of the best guitar-based digi-bongo acapella-rap-funk-comedy folk duos of all time, after all.

#6

Brainwashed - George Harrison

This album was released posthumously, with George passing away in the middle of recording it. For that, this album can't help but stick with you. Thinking about how one person brought so much joy though their music makes the songs on this album particularly moving.

It's also, in my opinion, George's best solo effort after All Things Must Pass.

'If you don't know where you're going, any road will take you there' is a phrase I still say, being stoln from the chorus of the first track

#7

A Passion Play - Jethro Tull

Picking a Tull album was very difficult. Not least because I only decided in the last two years to collect all of their albums.

I borrowed this album about 6 years ago from Tom (cheers, again), and it was the first time I've ever had to actually try to like an album. This is as inaccessible as Tull get, but seeing as the first ever Tull I listened to was Thick As A Brick, I thought I'd probably like their other 44 minute song.

It definitely took a while, but this album really is brilliant. And for making me think about it for so long, probably deserves to be on this list more than any other Tull album.

#8

Joe Perry - Joe Perry

Joe Perry, lead guitarist for Aerosmith, has 5 solo albums. But, let's be honest, this is the only one that's consistently good.

So why did this leave an impression? Well mainly because, other than the drums, Joe plays every single instrument on the record, which was very impressive to me at the time.

Shakin' My Cage is still one my favourite hard-rocking songs ever.

#9

The Best of Motörhead - Motörhead

A 'Greatest Hits' had to sneak in somewhere. This was probably the first album I ever bought that I still listen to today. I think I was 13 at the time, and when I picked it up in HMV I remember some old guy next to me saying 'that's a bit heavy for someone your age isn't it?'.

Honestly, Motörhead aren't really that heavy of a band. But back then, this was my first introduction in to hard rock 'n' roll. And clearly, it made an impression.

#10

Come Away With Me - Norah Jones

An easy pick, this one. After going on a bit of a rock 'n' roll binge in my early teens, this album taught me that I was allowed to like things that weren't hard rocking.

For me, this is the best that easy-listening gets.

#11

Toast - Raise Your Glass To A Burning Bridge

Well this is cheating if ever I saw it.

So this is an album from my old band, but it probably made a bigger impression on me than any other album on this list.

Writing the songs, spending a full week 9-5 recording in a stuffy bedroom, mixing it over the course of an entire year. This album is the product of 2 years hard work. It doesn't matter if some of it isn't very good, I'll be coming back to this album to relive the memories in decades to come.

#12

Will Smith's Greatest Hits - Will Smith

Here's another relative wild card. No ZZ Top, no Steeleye Span. Nope, it's Will Smith.

I'm pretty sure I only bought this so I could listen to the Fresh Prince theme song, but it turns out I actually really the rest of his songs too.

Like Norah Jones, this was another wake-up to the fact that I could like things that aren't rock. Is Will Smith actually good rap music? It doesn't matter, I like it.

Banded Together

Before University, I had an extremely brief stint as the vocalist of a band in Comprehensive School which lasted for one practice before we all realised we couldn't be bothered.

First Year

On arrival to University, I was somewhat shunted by BandSoc as during Freshers' Fair I was given a rather frosty reception after disclosing that I fancied myself as a vocalist. Somewhat fortuitously, the two people who became my best friends on my Law course turned out to be musicians. Rachel played guitar and Chris was a bassist. I also knew my friend Jack from Swansea, also in Nottingham, was a drummer in what was then known as Spirit Level. I then attempted to put us 4 together in a room and see if we could hash out something...
I have never been very good at writing songs from scratch, having no prior musical training. If I'm writing a song, I concentrate on the story involved in the lyrics and a melody which I can sing in my, admittedly rather limited, vocal range. The problem with this method of course is that when trying to inform my fellow bandmates of what I've written then I can't use the language of music; I just sing the melody I've constructed and arrogantly expect the other musicians to attempt to work around it.
In what might be described as a magnificent defiance of the above sentence, I started to form the idea that I could write an entire concept album around the story of an opportunistic murderer who descended in to insanity (taking some inspiration from Alice Cooper's Welcome To My Nightmare, Welcome 2 My Nightmare and Along Came A Spider)...

Nothing ever really came of my attempts in first year, though that was to change...

Second Year

Second year marked my first involvements in BandSoc. Rachel, Chris and myself realised that if we wanted to get anything done then we would probably need a practice room. We all joined BandSoc, and I'm sure Simon (Cass) would happily describe me as an arrogant and cocky prick. I would soon after run, successfully, to be the Society's General Secretary, at which point Simon explicitly told me exactly what he thought of me. I mean, a bit harsh, sure, but to be fair I can't say he wasn't wrong.
So having a vocalist, guitarist and bassist, we needed a drummer. Jack had one practice with us but soon realised we weren't complicated enough for him, and so I turned to my long suffering neighbour and housemate Olly who was also a drummer. We dabbled with the name 'Funktus Officio' before settling on 'Denning' after the famous rebellious Court of Appeal Law Lord.

The year unfolded in a mix of practice and song-writing. I would write songs without any idea how the rest would play it and they would attempt to work around it (a la Matt's Texting). Chris or Rachel would come up with a riff and I would choose already penned lyrics from my above concept album to fit (a la That Bitch, Blood On My Chin, Feeling Down). Or Chris/Olly would come to practice with an already written song and we would try and learn it (a la Now Open Your Eyes).
As a quick side-note, Matt's Texting was written by my old friend Biggins whilst we were on a train back from Cardiff as my, then, girlfriend wasn't replying to my texts. We were both tipsy from wine from plastic cups. That Bitch, on the other hand, was a combination of my feelings towards an ex-girlfriend, some input from Simon (Davies, though he likely doesn't remember), and me trying to fit a song in to my overall concept album structure.
In the end we decided to change our name to 'Same But Different' on the basis that our songs ultimately revolved around similar chord structures and yet ended up sounding rather different. We also couldn't pin down a genre which we might be described as, as each of our songs seemed to appeal to a different genre.

Our nail in the coffin came from yours truly. During my first two years at University, I had developed a taste for prog-rock. I had always been a Jethro Tull fan, but in my first two years I accumulated a number of their more experimental albums, as well as developing a taste for Blue Öyster Cult and their experimental brand of 70s rock. Supported by a somewhat similarly minded Chris, I decided to embark on my magnum opus: Through The Steel.
Through The Steel was to be a seven-part epic where each part rehearsed a phase of human history where the alloy 'steel' was used to commit murders. I wrote the introduction using rather heavy borrowing from the melody of 'Golden Age of Leather' by BÖC, and the following three verses under the impression that separate melodies and rhythms would be used for each. The final four verses were lyrically written in a rather haphazard fashion as I tried to imagine the uses of steel in the middle and modern ages without research. Following a number of protracted and intense band practices we ended up with melodies and riffs for all verses which more-or-less fit each time period covered. Unfortunately, when it came to recording the song for the BandSoc CD we were rather unprepared, having finished the song only the week before. It also didn't help that we hadn't properly written segues between sections. What ended up on the CD was something that all four of us are both proud and embarrassed of in equal measure. There are some moments of great music where everything simply gelled, but others where were clearly a complete mess. We ended up with a ~12minute song which really needed longer, but Rachel and Olly were never really in to the whole prog thing.
However, I would like it noted that I believe that the full lyrics to Through The Steel are some of my best and ultimately form a pretty decent epic poem which uses a number of literary techniques which I naively think someone might one day notice.

Our Battle of the Bands entry was a much more standard affair of (what we thought were) our best <4 minute songs, but we didn't get through the heats. We blame it on the fact that we played two ballads when we should have been more upbeat, but it's years ago and I don't really remember.

Third Year

Ok, so technically Toast started at the end of second year but bear with me. In Same But Different, I think there was something of an understanding that we would disband at the end of the year (music differences and all that crap). At the same time, my BandSoc committee contemporary, Ed, was losing all members of his band to graduation. Our mutual friend, Mike, had suggested to both of us that we should get together as we both had an interest in somewhat non-mainstream rock. This topic was sprung on my 20th Birthday where I was absolutely smashed and subsequently invited Ed to both form a band and come with me on holiday to Berlin (which did indeed occur with Ed, Mike and my Swansea friend, John, and we had lots of fun). Chris, Ed and I decided to call ourselves 'Are You A Boy Or Are You A Girl' after the question asked in each Pokémon game, for some reason.
Chris was somehow still willing to work with me and we formed a band. We had 2/3 practices at the end of second year where we jammed and together assembled the songs which would subsequently be known as Addicted To Sleep and Of Kings. Chris and myself alternated on drums as we were both competent at hitting things, but we wanted a dedicated drummer.
At the same time, I had wormed my way up in to Room Sec in BandSoc, leaving me in charge of the practice room. This year was to be a big year in BandSoc history as every member of the committee was competent and eager. We got a lot done. Chris was even Social Sec.

Enter Gina. Our magnificently technically proficient drummer, who I presume was looking for someone doing something fun and complicated and therefore ended up with us. To be fair, Levi Civita already had Max. After some courting Gina ended up joining us.
During one of our practices we had a 15 minute break in Mooch (the campus bar), and decided to come up with a proper name. After lots of to and fro-ing, I noticed 'Toast' on the menu and suggested it but in the 'cheers' sense. We liked the pun, it stuck.

After what was somewhat a lyrical dictatorship in Same But Different I was taken aback by what was initially a 50/50 split between Ed and myself as lyricists. I had always been under the impression that you write your own parts. But then, AC/DC's Brian Johnson no longer writes any lyrics so it isn't that weird. I quickly adjusted and was suddenly having the time of my life. To confuse me further, Ed took lead vocals on a few sections of songs. I mean, fortunately I always had synth or harmonica to play, but it confused me nonetheless as resident lead vocalist.
We wrote songs with some odd beats, there were big tempo changes, three of us had to have access to keyboards due to the varying use of synth and keys. I got to showcase my harmonica and Ed brought in his Melodica. Chris wrote a song, but on the whole the music was pretty unilaterally 'Toast'.
Our lyrics were psychedelical, non-sensical, historical, economic, satire, political, provocative. I even wrote a bloody rap verse for god's sake.

For the BandSoc CD we recorded our *ahem* most popular song; Addicted To Sleep. I mean, I'm still a reasonably limited vocalist, but I believe that what I can sing I can sing rather well. I would also like to think I'm quite a good lyricist. In all, I think Jonesin' On The Dreamscapes Of A Yesteryear: Sleep Is The Fallacy The Pushes Me To The Brink Of Mastering The Art Of Impressionist Painting (Addicted To Sleep), to give it it's stupidly long full title, is my best overall contribution. Though perhaps my vocals on A Knight For Pretty Lights on our album (see below) were slightly better.
We had a few gigs, even some outside of BandSoc, and entered Battle of the Bands where after some (fortunate?) drop outs ended up in the final. Apparently we achieved the highest scores for originality, and yet came last. In all honesty, I take that as a win. We set out to be a bit weird, and we did exactly that.

Over the summer, we even recorded an album: Raise Your Glass To A Burning Bridge.

https://toastuon.bandcamp.com/releases

It contains every song we ever wrote except for 'My dog died and my girlfriend left me and she took the fridge so there's no food so I had to eat my dog and then I found some food so I didn't have to eat the dog and now I feel sad so I drank my tears as a drink alone: He's never coming back' (never performed and Ed had to remind me of its full and proper title). All of the drums had to be recorded in one afternoon in Ed's living room. We even recorded Ed's shower for added effect.
Despite this, and the fact that we recorded EVERYTHING ELSE in one single week in Ed's bedroom: I am proud of this album. It documents a progress. An achievement. I have released an album. Not only that, but I've released an album with a group of friends. We had huge musical differences, and yet ended up with something which I think we're all at least somewhat happy with.

With the end of 3rd year came the end of Toast. Ed took off for Bath to do his PhD, taking the synths with him. Gina, on the other hand, stayed but looked for more complicated and mathematical (I think it's fair to say?) ventures.

Fourth Year

Fourth year was shit. I had no band. No people to form a band with. I had about 10 songs worth of lyrics, and continued to write more.
I missed it.
Even practice once a week was a chance to let go, scream out the demons. That was gone. The chance to shout out the words I'd written. That was gone. There was only the Masters.
I regret my lack of band in fourth year. So much.

Fifth Year

If I have to explain to you why I have a fifth year: I had three years undergrad law, then a postgrad in Criminal Justice Law, I am now doing a second Masters in Socio-Legal and Criminological Research Methods as a precursor to my PhD in Law which I will be starting next year subject to me passing this. Don't worry, this year and my PhD are funded. 

Basically: I need a band. I don't just want a band, I need one to keep me sane. To stop me going off the rails. The frustration and emotion involved in studying 24/7 is too much to bear. I need an outlet where I can just let my hair down and scream out some lyrics. Whether they're mine or we're doing a cover. Singing is just what I need to do. If there's harmonica and changes in time-signature then all the better but I really don't care.
I know I'm not the best vocalist. But I'm good at what I do. And I need to do it.

So far this year, Chris is (god knows why) still willing to stick with me as either a bassist or (preferably) a rhythm guitarist. Jedd, my old BandSoc mucca, is considering lead guitar. Leaving us drums and, most likely, bass to fill. The prog has probably fallen by the wayside. I just want an outlet. But if we can produce something good, then all the better.

Don't Be A Punk, Be Punctual

This is a guide for people who can't turn up to places or events on time when they have agreed to. There are few things I hate as passionately as people who are late, so here is an explanation why exactly you have to be on time to things and a few tips on how you can achieve this while avoiding common mistakes. Although this will mainly apply to occasions when you are only meeting one or two people (the more people there are, the less that you (the late person) matter to the overall situation), it can also apply to parties or large gatherings.

What is 'on time'?

Firstly, we must establish what you agree to when you say, for example, "I'll be there at 1pm". What you are saying is that you will be at a particular place, on a particular day, at a particular time. Now, being on time does not mean being there at exactly 13.00 as social norms allow a bit of leeway either side, or what I will call the 'on time zone'. The on time zone is generally accepted to be approximately 5 minutes either side of the agreed time (some say 10 minutes either side, but then these are the people that would never use the early 10 minutes allowed so they can be ignored). Being on time means being at location X between 12.55 and 13.05 as it allows for things such as different walking speeds, stubborn crossings and general minor unforeseen circumstances.
Also, for the purposes of this blog post, I will continue using 1pm as the agreed meeting time, but will also use W for 'the one who is waiting' and L (or sometimes "You" as it is advice directed at you, the reader) for 'late person' for any examples. I will also assume that L has not given W any prior warning, which will be discussed further later on.

Why must I be on time?

• If you are late, what you are saying to any W is "my time is more important than yours." If W has arrived within the on time zone parameters, what L is doing is making W stand alone... waiting... and waiting... If it's outside, it may be cold, raining. Regardless, it will be boring and waste of W's time.
• L is saying that he is a lazy, inconsiderate arse who clearly doesn't own a watch or indeed have any sense of timing or tact.
• Every minute that L is late, W is considering moving on with his life without him. If L can't even be bothered to be on time, why should W continue waiting for him? This may lead to W leaving the meeting place, and most likely he will not inform L of this as punishment.
• Every minute that L is late, W is planning intricate and intimate ways of killing L.
• W may feel like he is wasting L's time. i.e. "If L isn't here yet he must be doing something more important than meeting me. Maybe L is putting off meeting me. If he's doing something important should we even be meeting up?" etc.
• It's just really rude.

What if I really can't be on time?

If there is a good reason why you will be late, then giving a prior warning is acceptable and will most likely save you from any of the issues in the previous section unless your excuse is particularly dire ("I slept in" is not good enough). The key thing here is when to inform the possible W of your lateness?
Work backwards from W's point of view. When will be the opportune moment to inform W of your lateness without causing him great inconvenience and bother. The sooner is obviously the better.
Unfortunately, most late-causing-events occur soon in the run up to the meet itself, however an informing text is still better than none and will cause W less grievance if he knows why you will be late, possibly letting W plan your lateness into his own journey to the meeting place (by walking/driving slower, taking some detours etc.).
One of the worst things to do if you're informing W of your lateness is to inform him when you're already late. This will most likely cause a great deal of annoyance and a frosty reception on L's eventual arrival, depending on exactly how late he was and what reason he had.
Even worse than this, however, is telling W during or after the allotted meeting time that you not going to meet him at all anymore. This will cause a seething rage and W will never trust you again for anything whatsoever. L has let W find his way to the meeting place, which may have taken some time, and has now cancelled on him. Making the journey to the meeting place, and the walk back home (or to whatever subsequent destination) pointless and a complete waste of W's time. This L is the worst kind of L to exist.

So, how can I be on time?

This is quite simple really. You own a time-keeping device, either a phone, watch, iPod. USE IT YOU INNUMERATE SOD. How long will it take you to get to the agreed upon location? Say, 20 minutes. How long will it take you to get ready from your exact current position? Say 5 minutes. You've agreed to meet at 1pm, so that means at 12.30 it is time to get ready and leave whatever you're doing. But it goes further back than this. It means being awake and clothed by 12.30. It means not starting an episode of a 44min TV show at 12pm. It means not, at 12.25, thinking "one more game/chapter etc. and then I'll leave". If you have a bag to be packed, how long will it take you? All of these things are time to be taken out of L's life, NOT W's who has to do the exact same things as you but somehow manages to do it on time.

Possible other factors

If, instead of a specific meeting time, W and L have agreed on a time range to meet within.
For example, they have agreed to meet between 12.30 and 12.45. What you do here is aim for the intermediate, in this case about 12.37, as this way you have about a 7 minute 'on time zone' which is rather generous. A common mistake here is for one to think that they get an on time zone bonus as well as the agreed range, meaning the accepted time where not sending a late-text would be extended by more than double than if it were a single time agreed upon. So L might think that he gets an extra 5 minutes either side of 12.30 and 12.45. If both thought this way then it could lead to a possible waiting time for W of 25 minutes with no obligation on L to inform W of his arrival time in advance. This is quite simply unacceptable and L would be shot on arrival.

If you are going to be late because of someone else.
Here, L may be late because he is leaving his house with a third party, T, to meet W together. In this example, T hasn't planned appropriately and is delaying both himself and L, which then leads to the obligation for L to beat T with various blunt objects until he is ready to leave. Whilst doing this, L must inform W of T's inadequacy and idiocy and relay a probable revised meeting time. In addition, L informing W of his violence towards T may make W feel better and will most likely make W consider L blameless for the lateness, transferring W's feelings of hatred to T. In fact, if L is going to be late then blaming anyone and anything is his best bet of surviving W's wrath.

If you have a real excuse.
I hate to inform you but there aren't many. A close friend, relative or L himself dying or being seriously injured may be accepted, but this must be communicated to W as soon as possible, unless L is actually involved with the dying or injury. L's house being on fire or getting arrested may be accepted, although if either of these are L's fault then there will be no sympathy and , if arrested, L should use his one phone-call to apologise to W and hope he understands.

Conclusion

DON'T BE LATE WHEN YOU YOURSELF HAVE AGREED TO BEING AT A PARTICULAR PLACE AT A PARTICULAR TIME
I have few regularly punctual friends, but I think so much higher of those that are, and so much lower of those that aren't. To those that know me, I'm NEVER late to anything unless it's someone else's fault. Learn by my example.
I think I'll finish on two quotes:

"If time's so precious why're you wasting mine?"
Weird Al Yankovic, Stop Forwarding That Crap To Me

"Turning up late to something is actually worse than turning up and proceeding to vomit all over their shoes"
Jeremy Clarkson, paraphrased from memory from a column years ago